Life, Love and The Universe

I jet-ski'ed yesterday. Although that may not sound like a big deal, it is to someone who is terrified of open water!

A number of years ago I did a few open-water swims in order to face this fear. I may have faced the fear, but didn't particularly enjoy the experience or overcome the fear. I finished the race, stumbling out of the lake, covered in seaweed and mud, feeling bedraggled and frustrated.

So – jetskiing put me back in that same place of "I'm scared, but I'm going to do it anyway."

Although I had an instructor sitting behind (more like around) me, anticipating whatever 'this crazy women' would (or wouldn't) do next I was still scared. I tended to let go of the accelerator completely when the ride got too bumpy!

 

But I loved the experience and wanted to do it again!

 

It's clear to me that my fear hasn't disappeared despite facing it, but facing it gave me some fun!

So, perhaps you may not get over all your fears, but it's important to not hold yourself or your life back despite having them.

 

The making of you is how you handle fear.

Be these internal (failure, embarrassment, change, or non-acceptance etc) or external fears.

Find one of your fears.

What can you do to move through it?

Just one little step is all it takes and you'll find that the Universe also has its arms around you.

 

Have a wonderful week, being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

Life, Love & The Universe

A few weeks ago I attended a 4-day seminar/training course.

One of the things mentioned early on were the words, "The first time is the hardest."

 

I felt these words were meant for me as I'd been trying to wake up early and start running in the morning again.

So, using this sentence as a tool I know the first morning would be the hardest! I got up – and it's been easier since.

 

On Monday I held my first public seminar. And with an evening like this came a few challenges and technical hiccups – but we had fun, survived with our learnings in tact.

 

And then today I've spent the entire day making videos for an online TV show I've been invited to host – it took me a while to get it all correct and uploaded, but assume that once all the glitches have been ironed out – as with everything, the first time would have been the hardest.

And it'll all flow from here.

 

So – what in your life are you still holding out on?

What are waiting to do or try, but haven't plucked up enough courage yet?

 

Remember – the first time is the hardest!

Give it a go!

 

Have a wonderful week, being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

PS. Our last Life Coaching Through Creative Art Workshop for the year is on 12^th December.

Bookings are also open for our 2011 workshops.

http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/workshops/

Life, Love and The Universe (Gossip)

I saw an interview last week with Ellen de Generes and Madonna. They made quite a few points on the issue they were debating (bullying), but Madonna ended the interview with a valid point – a suggested place to start for change to happen.

She said that she urged everyone to try, for just one day – to not gossip.

I thought this to be simple, precise and practical advice.

 

Gossip can be as easily defined as saying something about someone that you wouldn't say to their face.

The dictionary defines it as "idle talk or rumor, esp. about the personal or private affairs of others"

 

• So …. How often do you find yourself talking about others?
  

 

• What does talking about others provide for you? (i.e. does it make you feel better about yourself somehow?)
  

 

• What does the gossip you're involved with actually say about you?
  

 

If you're not speaking about other people, what else do you have to talk about?

How full is your life?

Try giving it up for just one day and see what evolves!

 

Have a wonderful week, being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

 

PS. Bookings are open for our 2011 workshops. Only one place is left for Become Authentic. Feel Abundant starting on 18^th January 2011.

http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/workshops/

Life, Love and The Universe

I attended a 50^th birthday party celebration on Saturday night. One aspect of the festivities were speeches that were given. The partners gave speeches about each other (they each turned 50) and their kids took their turn and said wonderful things about their parents.

Naturally, due to the celebratory nature of the evening, many good things were said and lots of jokes were shared. But I got to thinking about what kinds of things would be said about me when I turned 50.

It's a little different to the coaching question I usually ask, which is usually, "What 3 things do you want written on your gravestone one day about WHO you were?".

Looking at as being at my 50^th, brings it a little more immediate and also gives more room for a detailed description of the life I'm leading – from someone else's perspective!

 

So – this week – choose your next milestone birthday and picture what the significant people in your life will say about you in their speeches?

 

What will this say about you?

How would you have lived your life up till then?

 

The bigger question however is: How does this compare to any speeches that would be given about you today?

If there is a mismatch between what you think they'll be saying about you today and what you'd wish for by the actual milestone date – what are you willing to do in the interim to change this?

 

Have a wonderful week, being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

 

PS. Seats are filling fast for "Can You Tell A Bird Not To Sing?"

Only ten places left!

Book now at:
http://www.completelyhuman.com/birdsing

SPIRITED LIVING

 

 

 

There is a new Australian TV series called "Spirited' which illustrates a relationship of sorts, between Henry (a ghost) and Suzy (the only person who can see him).

Henry is trapped in ghost-format in Suzy's apartment because it appears he needs to resolve some life issues still. He's stuck in this particular building, being not alive, but also not quite dead.

This couple have interesting and odd interactions, with him being inadvertently part of her family dramas (because he can't go anywhere!). She then learns from him in return, as is demonstrated in their following conversation:

 

"You may be Ms 'I'm Alive', but you're walking around like you're dead anyway."

"Why? Because I have impulse control!" she retorts, proudly.

"No. Because you don't know how to feel. You don't engage. An Ice-Princess," Henry continues.

"I feel many things!" she shouts, kicking over a chair as if to show the point.

Changing focus, Henry sits down and says, "The truth is that if they were offering tickets to hell, I'd grab one with both hands. But, instead I'm stuck here and I don't know why."

Suzy takes a breath and wisely acknowledges,

"Most people feel like that. They feel like they're stuck here and don't know why."

 

The English word spirit comes from the Latin, spiritus meaning "breath".

Your spirit is thus the animating, sensitive or vital principle in you, similar to the soul, which is often taken to be the seat of your mental, intellectual and emotional powers.

Obviously the air that you breathe is an inherent part of your being. It flows through you - giving life to every part of your body. Breathing is a natural process, one that you don't need to actively DO anything about, or even be really aware of.

But Living is something different. Just because you're breathing, doesn't mean that you're necessarily truly ALIVE. This takes more awareness.

 

Are you perhaps one of the many who are just 'stuck here, going through the motions without knowing why?"

If you'd like to change this, change your thinking to a more consciously aware plane.

For example, take some time and think for yourself:

 

• What really adds life to you?
  
• What makes you feel alive?
  
• Why are you here?
  

 

Your spirit, or inner core is where your feelings lie, but recognising them is often the challenge.

Set your spirit free, by seeing how you feel.

Seeing how you feel may make you vulnerable, but this is actually, what you're really about.

And others are just the same.

 

Sonia Choquette says that "Your spirit embraces life head-on and rides the ups and downs, the ebb and flow, and the shifts and changes of life with determination and courage."

Your ego on the other hand tries to hold on tightly. It is fearful and tries to control.

This resists the flow of life. It is fearful and tries to stop change.

 

Have a look at where your ego is playing games:

• What are you avoiding?
  
• What or who are you trying to control?
  
• What are you holding onto, scared of letting go?
  
• What are you procrastinating about?
  

 

Ego-living means you're trying too hard, fearfully managing your life, rather than openly flowing with it.

Allow your Spirit to handle all that's coming towards you.

Namaste has now generally been used as meaning, "I honor the Spirit in you which is also in me."

Look for this loving life-force in others as well. Understand that Ego creates enemies but Spirited Living wins friends. It's energetic and contagious, naturally creating a connection with others at a heart level.

 

A self-aware connection to yourself and others will prevent you from living ghost-like and empty.

This often takes honesty, self-discovery and doing what makes you come alive.

Give it a try.

 

Let your mind start a journey thru a strange new world. Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be...Close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you'll live as you've never lived before."

Erich Fromm

Life, Love and The Universe (17th August)

I joined a new library today.

I've belonged to the same library for 3 years despite moving into a different suburb.

I returned my books (slightly overdue, of course) this morning and realised the silliness of this monthly trip.

I've even complained a couple of times that I'd worked through all the books in the section of my genre-preference. But I'd resigned myself to the fiction section instead and still continued the habit of visiting the library.

But today, for some reason, this no longer made sense. It suddenly felt like I was settling for 2^nd best and wondered if there was a library closer to home! Duh.

To make a long story short – yes – I joined a larger library around the corner, with an online system and heaps of new books that got me excited.

Life works like this as well.

You may be doing the same old thing over and over again, because, well, it works. And it's "fine for now". It may be all you've ever known.

But are you in fact merely 'settling'?

Are you (without realising it) re-adjusting your expectations to less than what is truly available to you?

If the change seems too hard and potentially uncomfortable then rather think about what lies on the other side of the so-called fence.

How does that feel?

And what do you need to do?

 

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

Life, Love & The Universe (10th August 2010)

For those of you who will recall last week's message about me struggling to download a tape off a camera and create a DVD, I'd gotten to the point where I let it go and gave up. But a day or so later I had a flash of inspiration in my driveway and turned round towards Dick Smith where I picked up a connecting cable I thought may work. It did!

And a few hours later I had DVDs of baby videos for a happy grandmother!

My realisation was that it seemed those adjectives I'd proudly displayed were still relevant, but somehow over the years I'd let go of the ego attachment to these lables. I had been willing to give up the camera challenge (and did), but then effortlessly the solution appeared anyway.

My further realisation is that these three words are not important as to how I'd like to be remembered one day.

What about you?

What parts of your identity are attached to serving your ego? (eg. intelligence, perfectionism, relationship-status or children).

So … if there was a resume of life – what adjectives would you rather prefer yours to contain?

Mine hopefully will be changed to: She loved; She gave with kindness; She understood.

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

PS. The new series of workshops start in October. Book your place now.

Life, Love and The Universe

I've spent the last couple of days trying to help a friend get videos off an old tape-video recorder onto a DVD. It's been a process and a half. Through the help of Dick Smith staff, Google forums and endless hours of persistent patience, we now have recordings. But only of the audio.

This does appear to be the problem with this particular camera and I'm at the point of giving up and moving on. Which brings me to today's subject – is it OK to give up?

At which point do you decide that something is no longer working for you and decide to make the necessary change?

This could relate to anything such as your career, your relationship, friendships or your health.

This could also refer to some big dream that is all-consuming and removes you from living in the present.

How much time and energy is being invested in something that is not turning out how you want it to?

How much of YOU is being eroded by merely "hanging in there" until things improve?

Change starts with you. It starts with you accepting what IS.

You need to understand what the likelihood of change in your current situation really is. If improvement or success in unlikely, then why keep yourself there?

 

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

 

PS. For more information on life change, Don't forget my E-book "Creating Life Change" is available at:

http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/resources/e-books/

PROTECTING YOUR TREASURE

I often tell a story about a grandmother who once told me, "I don't need Life-Coaching as I've finally learned to say NO. Especially to my family!"

I laughed at this comment, appreciating the inherent wisdom in it.

 

The ability to say no, with suitable assertiveness, compassion and respect is a skill.

Often this means saying No to things not in your value system, your purpose, your vision or to something that impedes progress on the way to your greater good. This kind of self-compromise takes away from your happiness, your fulfilment and satisfaction. A bigger challenge (as the grandmother so rightly observed) is saying NO to something within your value system such as a family request.

So - How do you handle these?

 

Being able to say no means you're aware of your inherent value, able to set your boundaries AND let other people keep theirs. It also means you're not dependent on their good opinion because somehow this will make you feel better about yourself. Further, it means you've detached from the responsibility of how they feel about themselves, as a result of your reaction.

Saying NO doesn't mean an aggressive approach to everything either. Some people retreat into isolation (always saying no to everything) as this prevents them from ever having to effectively assert themselves at all.

But, the good news is that sometimes a mere choice of suitable wording makes a remarkable difference in how any interaction occurs.

Eg.

"Unfortunately I currently have too many commitments on my time at the moment."

"Wednesdays are my days for the family. Perhaps another day?"

"I don't feel the need for that in my life right now. But thank you for thinking of me."

 

Notice how all the wording is focused on YOU. All you're doing is protecting your boundaries and allowing yourself to fully take up the space in your life that you deserve. These statements all reflect how you feel and what you want.

A continued inability to say no or assert yourself very often results from a fear:

• A fear of disappointing others
  
• A fear of not being liked
  
• A fear of seeming incapable
  
• The list goes on….
  

 

Ask yourself what you believe the person will think of you when you say NO – therein is a clue to your fear.

Nathaniel Branden defines assertiveness as "being authentic in our dealings with others; treating our values and persons with decent respect in social contexts; refusing to fake the reality of who we are or what we esteem in order to avoid disapproval; the willingness to stand up for ourselves and our ideas in appropriate ways in appropriate contexts".

 

If you're reading this and thinking to yourself "I say no because I don't want to hurt their feelings" that suggests a distrust of yourself and of your relationships.

But through effective communication you'll be able to stand your ground and meet your own needs whilst saying NO to your nearest and dearest.

If you were to avoid hurting everyone's feelings, you'd never actually do or say anything. You'd continually walk on eggshells. So, how about letting others' handle their own sensitivities? If you communicate with both love and compassion both parties are given the opportunity to take responsibility for themselves.

As Maxwell Maltz says, "We are injured and hurt emotionally, not so much by other people or what they say and don't say, but by our own attitude and our own response."

 

I often use the example of empty and full vessels in coaching sessions. Each of you is inherently a full vessel, but through actions, beliefs and thoughts that don't honour you, you tend to empty your vessel (albeit it often subconsciously). Continually giving to others, thinking for others and trying to protect others from their own feelings are ways you may empty your vessel.

 

Even the Kings James bible says the following… "We have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us."

 

So choose instead, to continually fill your own vessel with love and compassion and watch the same overflow to others. The ironic result is that you'll naturally be giving without that ever-difficult feeling of "trying" to do so, all well within your own boundaries.

 

And what other kind of giving can be more authentic?

 

 

 

 

Completely Human Events

 

NORDIC WALKING:

Every Saturday morning

8.00 am: Nordic Walking @ Trigg Clarko Reserve ($8pp incl pole hire)

WORKSHOPS:

1. Life Coaching Through Creative Art in Roleystone
   

   (Full Day option)
   

25^th July 2010

    29^th August 2010

12^th September 2010

10am -4 pm; $225pp

This is a jam-packed day (value-wise) to really discover the essences of self-acceptance, self-love AND what holds you back from your personal power.

Also - discover your unique purpose and it may truly surprise you!

This includes ALL art materials, canvases, workbooks, 2 course lunch & ongoing refreshments

2)    Become Authentic. Feel Abundant

1. week course starting on 3rd August 2010
   

1. Take the Authenticity Test. How Real are you really?
     What does this even mean?
   

2. With Self-awareness being the cornerstone of success, how self-aware are you?
   

3. Do a Wellness Test and see what your life looks like. What is the link between your emotions, your thoughts and your results?.
   

4. How do perceptions rule you?
   

5. How do your beliefs & fears limit you?
   

6. How are your Behaviours, Decisions & Communication suffering as a result?
   

7. How connected are you to your Desires, Dreams and Vision?
        What Big Dream are you pursuing? Also discover the truth about affirmations and intention.
   

8. Do your relationships meet your needs? Are they working?
   

9. Enjoy a personalised Self-Empowerment Review with feeback
   

 

Starting on Tuesday 3rd August 2010.             Time : 6.30pm to 8.30pm in Subiaco

Early Bird Price: $280 pp (payable by 22nd July 2010)

Regular Price:      $360 pp (payable by 29th July 2010)

 

3)    Creative Coaching: 4 Week-Series

 

What you will take away over the 4 weeks:

1. Self-Acceptance, Self-Esteem & Self-Discovery
2. Letting go of your Limiting Beliefs- and Fears
3. You and Your Relationships
4. Creating an overall Vision for your life and Setting Goals.

All 12 hours of Life Coaching Plus Art Guidance for only $345 - all inclusive!
We limit the groups to 4 (for personalised coaching attention) so please book quickly!

Next Dates:     13^th, 20^th, 27^th October & 3^rd November 2010

 

SOCIAL EVENTS:

Women's Dinner

11^th August 2010; 8^th September 2010; 19^th October 2010

Join us on FACEBOOK (Completely Human Group) for regular updates & invitations.

Life, Love & The Universe (20th July 2010)

A client this past week sat reflecting on how far she'd come in her coaching journey. She was trying to understand the process she'd been through and said to me, "I'm not the same person I was. I'm still feeling sad about things but I'm really happy."

I paused deliberately until she consciously heard what she'd said.

Surprised, she then said to me, "That doesn't even make sense really – but my heart understands it!"

 

She understood Jung's words, "I'd rather be whole, than good."

This is called integration. It's about feeling, understanding and owning all aspects of ourselves.

 

For eg. The ability to feel sad, but be happy.

The ability to fail, but not be a failure.

The ability to say/do silly things without fear of being labelled stupid.

 

Practicing this level of living, means becoming authentic because there is no longer a need to hide anything.

ALL the parts of you make you real. Your denied parts make you fake.

 

What's the biggest thing you're scared of someone finding out about you?

How much energy do you spend covering this up (without even noticing you're doing it of course!)?

 

Accept this fear as part of your truth (or realise that it's not) and you'll find an equally-accepting world out there after all!

 

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.

www.completelyhuman.com

 

PS. My new 8-week course, "Be Authentic. Feel Abundant" will help you look further at some of the things that keep you hiding away from being REAL and/or keep you trying too hard to be a better person than you believe you are.

This course starts on 3^rd August in Subiaco.

http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/workshops/your-personal-wealth/

 

PPS. The next Women's dinner event is on the 11^th August – please email me if you haven't received details of it. Everyone is welcome!

Become Authentic. Feel Abundant.

 

The more you're aware of yourself - the more you accept yourself.

The more you accept yourself. The more you allow yourself to 'be'.

The more you allow yourself to be - the more you love yourself.

The more you can express this, the more you love others.

And therein resides your personal ABUNDANCE.

 
 

What you will gain from this 8-week Course:

 
 

1. Take an authenticity test. How Real are you & how much are you just "trying"?
With Self-awareness being the cornerstone of success, how self-aware are you?

 

2. Do a Wellness Test and see what your life actually looks like.

What is the link between your emotions, your thoughts and your results?

 

3. How do perceptions rule you?

 

4. How do your beliefs & fears limit you?

 

5. How are your Behaviours, Decisions & Communication suffering as a result?

 

6. How connected are you to your Desires, Dreams and Vision?
    What Big Dream are you pursuing? Also discover the truth about affirmations and intention.

 

7. Do your relationships meet your needs? Are they working?

 

8. A personalised Self-Empowerment Review with feeback.

 

This course has been designed to help you grasp and integrate valuable personal growth concepts as you go along.  Doing it this way, you're guaranteed to both feel and see changes happening in your life in a sustainable way!

 

This practical, self-empowering course starts on Tuesday 3rd August 2010 from 6.30pm to 8.30pm in Subiaco

Early Bird Price: $280 pp (payable by 22nd July 2010)

Regular Price:      $360 pp (payable by 29th July 2010)

Become Authentic. Feel Abundant

Become Authentic. Feel Abundant.

The more you're aware of yourself - the more you accept yourself.

The more you accept yourself. The more you allow yourself to 'be'.

The more you allow yourself to be - the more you love yourself.

The more you can express this, the more you love others.

And therein resides your personal ABUNDANCE.

 
 

What you will gain from this 8-week Course:

 
 

1. Take an authenticity test. How Real are you & how much are you just "trying"?
With Self-awareness being the cornerstone of success, how self-aware are you?

 

2. Do a Wellness Test and see what your life actually looks like.

What is the link between your emotions, your thoughts and your results?

 

3. How do perceptions rule you?

 

4. How do your beliefs & fears limit you?

 

5. How are your Behaviours, Decisions & Communication suffering as a result?

 

6. How connected are you to your Desires, Dreams and Vision?
    What Big Dream are you pursuing? Also discover the truth about affirmations and intention.

 

7. Do your relationships meet your needs? Are they working?

 

8. A personalised Self-Empowerment Review with feeback.

 

This course has been designed to help you grasp and integrate valuable personal growth concepts as you go along.  Doing it this way, you're guaranteed to both feel and see changes happening in your life in a sustainable way!

 

This practical, self-empowering course starts on Tuesday 3rd August 2010 from 6.30pm to 8.30pm in Subiaco

Early Bird Price: $280 pp (payable by 22nd July 2010)

Regular Price:      $360 pp (payable by 29th July 2010)

Life, Love and the Universe (July 14th)

I MC’d a business breakfast meeting this morning and ended off with an excerpt which seemed to touch many people. So I thought to share it further.
It comes from a speech made by Pulitzer Prize-winning author, Anna Quindlen which I’ve taken the liberty to edit and paraphrase slightly for convenience.

“You cannot be really first rate at your work if your work is all you are. So here's what I wanted to tell you today: Get a life. A real life, not a manic pursuit of the next promotion, the bigger pay cheque, the larger house.

Get a life in which you notice the smell of salt water pushing itself on a breeze at the seaside, a life in which you stop and watch how a red-tailed hawk circles over the water, or the way a baby scowls with concentration when she tries to pick up a sweet with her thumb and first finger.

Get a life in which you are not alone. Find people you love, and who love you. Get a life in which you are generous. And realize that life is the best thing ever, and that you
have no business taking it for granted.

It is so easy to waste our lives, our days, our hours, and our minutes.
It is so easy to exist instead of to live.”
So, please Get a Life. It was meant for living after all.

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You!
www.completelyhuman.com

Life, Love and the Universe (July 7th)

Ask and you will receive.
Do you find this works for you? Never? Sometimes? Always?
You may not always get exactly what you asked for. But admittedly, you usually receive something. Even if it’s merely a new perspective.

If you’re one of the many people who aren’t used to asking for anything - (from directions to any larger form of help) this may be something worth practicing.
Those who do ask are often surprised.

Although I receive many calls with requests for information, suggestions or assistance in brainstorming an idea, but I’d like to share a simple example with you on this concept.
A client called to ask where we’d had our canvas “goodie” bags made. She needed some for a charity run she was involved with. But as our conversation progressed, an alternate arrangement that neither of us had thought about before arose. And it would cost her nothing.

So – my two thoughts for this week:
(1) Learn to ask. Sometimes this seems like the hardest part. But give it a go - as you never know where help can come from.

(2) Don’t be attached to what the answer “has to” look like. Be open to receive that which comes. It may be a yes; it may be a no. Or it may be something completely different than anticipated.
(for example: you may not get the canvas bags you asked and even phoned about, but you’ll receive an equally feasible solution without any expected cost!)

I trust you’ll receive something special that you want, this week.

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.
www.completelyhuman.com

Life, Love and the Universe (June 14th)

I saw the movie “Sex In The City 2” last week. I don’t see Oscar nominations knocking at its door, but it was entertaining. (Chewing gum for the eyes, as my mother used to say).
As always I found something to take away and this time it was Carrie’s words to her 3 friends, “We’re making up our own rules for our relationship”. She was referring to her and Big’s marriage of course.

This idea was followed up (for me) the following day when a client sat in front of me, using self-empowered language of what he wanted (and deserved) from his current relationship. He ended with the words, “I don’t just want what’s normal – I’m not normal. I’m unique.”
Wow! And that coming from someone who initially considered himself lacking in self-confidence and shy.

Now, we can hardly call Carrie shy – but she did take a while (and many relationships) to figure out who she wanted in her life.
And now she’s figuring out how to make it work.

You also have this opportunity in life – to work out what works for you in your most important relationships. Follow a ‘rule book’ that makes YOU happy and fulfilled.
And then you will be.

So – this week consider:
• What do you want from your relationship(s)?
• How do you deserve to be treated?
• Are your needs being met?
• Does the communication satisfy you?

• And importantly, what are YOU going to do or say for any changes to happen?

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.
www.completelyhuman.com

PS. If you haven’t signed up for our free inspiration quotes do so at:
http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/inspiration/motivational-quotes/

An Intelligent Life

An Intelligent Life : A Practical Guide to Relationships, Intimacy and Self-Esteem

Facebook – Friend(s) or Foe(s)?

 

 

Today (May 31^st) is officially 'Quit Facebook Day' - and with Facebook continually in the media gathering the popularity (or notoriety) that it has, I've started to wonder what it's really all about.
Facebook, being everywhere, is now part and parcel of our society today. Most organisations and people want you to 'befriend' them or 'like them' (with the 'fan' option no longer being available!).
The power and influence of social networking can no longer be denied – and Facebook seems to be the Big Mamma.
It was launched in February 2004, by Mark Zuckerberg. He was a Harvard undergrad student who realised that it was time to change the traditional student directory they used. His realisation was that, although students develop affiliations on campus and constantly meet new people, they needed a further place to find out "more" about someone you were interested in.
So – today, 6 years later the phenomenon is still exploding with a myriad of reasons why people join the community. Be it:

• To stay in touch with friends
• To pass time spent on your own
• To check up on what your kids are doing
• To promote your business
• To find a potential romantic interest
• Wanting to 'belong'… etc

What helps the growth is that Facebook is easy to use. It's free communication providing you with a certain degree of anonymity and control whilst still able to "socialise" or connect to your heart's content.
To be honest, initially, I didn't quite "get" the Facebook concept. It seemed a little fake, absurd and slightly desperate.
I've since accepted what an awesome social forum it is – being able to connect with so many people, so effortlessly. Sharing photos, staying in touch, online chats and sharing events are all part of the fun – let alone the games, poking and farming!
It's no secret that many individuals (with healthy social skills and not) have made connections with people in places that wouldn't usually be possible. With new connections, obviously, your network of learning and experience extends nationally and internationally.
Relationships have been formed and sometimes even lifetime partnerships!
That being said, I do however still have the following concerns:
Individuals who have previously been isolated due to social phobias, low self-esteem or fears now have a means to connect and see what lies beyond their 'cocooned' worlds. But they can do this without having to face the pressures that the external world often provides.
This experience of the world opening up for them may merely be for something they may not actually be. Characters, personalities and indeed entire lives can be developed and expressed as chosen.
People will 'like' you for who they think you are.
Is this healthy for personal growth and self-acceptance?
I'm not so sure.


Is the fact that Facebook was created to find out "more" about others an indication that we as a society, don't ask enough questions of each other? Or spend enough time with each other?



George Fraser, the author of "Click" is passionate about connecting with others — By this he means that heartfelt feeling of trust, and the exciting burst of energy. And then when at least two people willingly add special value to each other and what they can achieve together is more than either could achieve alone, that's when they CLICK.


So, bearing both the negative and positive aspects in mind, it's important to remember what George Fraser says "Superior interpersonal skills trump all other skills. Be careful who your friends are – your top 5 define you."




So although the world is rapidy changing (both people & technology) don't forget what you're really about.
What is it that you want from others? Is it merely interaction – or do you really want to connect (Click)?
Is Facebook assisting you to move forward in your life, or helping you to hide away?


As with everything in life, make your choices, set your personal boundaries and act within your integrity.







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Life, Love and the Universe (May 25th)

I ran the HBF ‘Run for a Reason’ race on Sunday. (A great race, route and organised event, by the way!)


I love races – I enjoy the vibe, the anticipation, the logistics, the crowds and the energy involved all around.

After we’d finished on Sunday, as I sat in the grandstand waiting for friends to come in I listened to the commentary over the PA system. They recounted the achievements of some of the participants; how one had lost 7kg to run it; how some had entered to beat their previous times; some trying to do 14km as their longest distance as yet and others who mere ran “to finish”.

This got me to thinking about individual goals.
Goals being unique – Goals being something that drives you forward – Something that pushes you to the next level – Towards something you want.

The reality is that just like being in a running event, each step in your life is also a deliberate forward movement. Bearing this in mind, do you know what you’re heading towards?

What goals are you actively pursuing that will make a difference in your life?
What steps are you taking to achieve this goal(s)?

And – what support do you have to get there?

Have a wonderful week, being Perfectly You
http://www.completelyhuman.com/

Creating Life Change

This blog documents one of the largest journeys of my life – the decision to leave my home country, South Africa and settle down to a new life in Australia. This change included a career change and starting up my own business at the same time.

It’s easy to merely write this – but the experience can be quite traumatic emotionally. So many people migrate, continually choosing to live in different places that we all tend to accept and overlook such change as “normal”.

The reality is that any change of this magnitude has profound and life-changing results within your life.

I’ve looked back on the experience and identified some of the elements that made the transition firstly possible, and challenging – but mostly wonderful.

I believe however, that anyone can apply these principles into any major life change or transition they’re experiencing. Everything will seem to flow (albeit not smoothly!) from a sense of satisfaction and peace.

Everything in life happens for a purpose. And it’s your challenge, after discovering what it is - to live in it.

The reality is that your life changes around you regardless of whether you actively participate or not. Even if you choose to stand still – your world continually moves forward. This then, by default, unfortunately means you move backwards.

Therefore, if you embrace and fully experience all dramatic change in your life as being a welcome journey, it will bring you happiness and fulfilment.

We are changing – we have got to change –

We can no more help it

Than leaves can help going yellow

And coming loose in autumn.

D.H. Lawrence

Life, Love and the Universe

We all have lots to do on any given day; with conflicts for our time being part and parcel of life. But how we handle it very much depends on how we think about it all.
How often are you saying (or thinking) “I’m too busy”; “I don’t have enough time”; - because if you’re saying/thinking that – you’re creating it.
The definition of efficiency is “the accomplishment of or ability to accomplish a job with a minimum of time and effort”.
Doesn’t that sound grand?

I had endless email & server problems last week due to not making a mere phone call a few weeks ago to find out how to clear out old emails. I left it for when “I have enough time to be on hold for so long…” (Being a customer support centre and all)

During these weeks however, I was hugely busy and productive, rolling out new ideas/workshops, seeing new clients and “going with the flow”. Yes – things did seem to take a minimum of time and effort.
But the reality is that my procrastination of making the call then cost me a week’s precious “time” and six more phone calls.

So – perhaps I was being efficient by focusing on what felt right, my priorities and immediate goals, but at the cost of the business’s overall effectiveness. Effectiveness means to produce the intended or expected result.

So – bottom line is that whatever systems you’re using in your life to be efficient and manage all the balls in the air at any given time, please ensure that you’re still being effective. And that means that through doing everything you’re doing, you’re still reaching your intended result, be it money, happiness, family-time, success, love or merely some form of inner peace.

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.
http://www.completelyhuman.com/

PS. Please check out our upcoming workshops for May and June.
http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/workshops/

Are Your Experiences Really Enough?

I started writing this article on the drive down to Busselton for the Half-Ironman event this weekend.

Being the day before the event, the conversations in the car milled around the usual topics that pre-race jitters bring up: training dramas; personal timing; event pacing; food need before and during the event; the respective cut-off times and tips for doing the quickest transitions…

A group of us travelled in convoy and this has reminded me of my running days of old – travelling to the larger events away from home. Taking part in a long distance event could take up to a week at times as we usually extended our stay for a small holiday.
A good example is how we planned a 3-week European trip around the Geneva marathon. I wanted to do a marathon in Heidi-land (Switzerland).

But thinking back now - I can’t remember the time I ran for that marathon, but I can remember the restaurants we ate at the week before; the feeling of being an “international runner” in a foreign race; I recall the sights and the sounds around the lake; seeing Ipods being used for the first time in a race; and of course the feeling in my legs as I boarded the flight to Rome the same night.

Reflecting on all of this makes me think about what we do in our lives to create experiences rather than merely doing things to produce results.
What is it that you treasure most: the experience; the shared moments with loved ones and friends; the memories you accumulate - or is the fun in the single-minded determination to achieve a goal you’ve set?

A single result is a wonderful and masterful achievement as you even receive a medal and the T-shirt to prove it. Yes, you may have a collection of certificates hanging on your walls – but perhaps there’s even more to it all when you allow yourself to enjoy the accumulation of special moments surrounding the events in your life?

After we’d done our race registration and collected our gear and goodie bags on Friday afternoon, I lay on my bed with my girlfriend chatting. Neil Diamond music was blaring in the background (thanks to the house-owners) and she was asking me about my university days, previous boyfriends and suchlike… yes, girl-talk.

Once again – I realised that I’d need to really think hard to remember the subjects I’d done over the years and the results I’d received (although I’m better academically than athletically!) – but a variety of stories of people, parties, student-holidays and heart-breaks came flooding out!

I’ve realised that my life is largely about people and relationships. But I don’t think I’m unique in this – I’m just allowing myself to experience as much as possible with regard to what life is offering up at any time.

Although, I’m sure it would be different if I were an elite athlete, my reality is that as I sat writing the article, wearing a cute (and unique) t-shirt designed for our triathlon team by one of the team members, I knew that my true joy and success of the entire Half-Ironman experience lay in the build-up, the actual race and in the celebration function afterwards – regardless of how long it took us to actually cross the finish line.

What are you sacrificing from the fuller picture of your life in order to achieve a single-focussed result?
Is this what you really want?

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.

Albert Schweitzer

Life, Love & The Universe

I'm currently re-reading many books I read years ago – with fresh eyes!
Fresh eyes lead to new understanding.
And I'm not alone in this - I took a life-path-number book along to our walking group breakfast on Saturday morning as I knew there'd be some people there who'd be interested.
And there were. (Aren't we all curious about ourselves?)
The interesting thing, for a few of us, is that although we'd read this information before, it had different meaning to us this time round.
There seemed to be lots of fresh pairs of eyes in the group.
But - this "fresh eye" concept could actually be relevant in more than one area of your life – if you're willing.

Not only in your reading – but with your opinions; your preconceptions; your beliefs and especially within your relationships.

How can you look at things from a new perspective today?
What "old" thinking/seeing patterns are you holding onto that may no longer really be true?
If you had to cast "fresh eyes" over the situation, what might you see?

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You
www.completelyhuman.com


PS. Don't forget our E-books: http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/resources/e-books/

Really Recommended Reading

Quote Of The Day

To live a creative life, we must lose our fear of being wrong.

Joseph Chilton Pearce

The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner: An Eclipse Novella (Twilight Saga)

Life, Love and the Universe

I saw the movie Alice in Wonderland this weekend. Besides always loving Johnny Depp, I really enjoyed this version of the story. It’s an old classic with many layers of meaning!

I thought to share with you today the conversation that Alice had with Absolem (the blue caterpillar). Late in the movie he asks her again who she is. She responds (quite agitatedly) that’s she’s just Alice – although she’s been shrunk, she’s been stretched, told what to do repeatedly and even stuffed into a teapot to be hidden!

I found that interesting as we too are often swayed by life. We’re often pulled between commitments, obligations, responsibilities and demands.
Society (even our family) try to make us fit into a certain mould.

So – what labels are you still wearing?
What responsibilities are attached to these labels?
Are these shrinking you – or stretching you in various directions?

More importantly is this the person you want to be?

How about remove yourself from the tug-of-war and considering, for yourself: “Who is the real you?”

Enjoy exploring!

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.
www.completelyhuman.com

PS. New Workshop looks at ‘Who Am I?”: Authentic Abundant Living
Check it out here: http://ee.completelyhuman.com.au/workshops/your-personal-wealth/

Life, Love and the Universe

I’ve been experiencing some car trouble lately. I was aware that something “didn’t feel right” for a few days as the car felt sluggish. After an appointment in the city area yesterday, an ominous error-warning light appeared on my dashboard which led us (me and the car) straight to “car hospital”.
All the way there I spoke gently, egging it along the freeway, promising it higher grade petrol - terrified that it would merely stop dead leaving me stranded.
(Don’t we always expect the worst somehow?)

The problem was quickly identified by the mechanics, a road test done and my car was released as “healed”.

Reflecting back on this later in the day, I realized the amount of worry we have about small things sometimes. We all know the old saying that says “most of what we worry about doesn’t, in fact, happen.”

What are you currently expending energy on that may not actually happen?
What can’t you control – but are trying to determine the outcome for?
Continued anxiety over the small stuff can chew you up from the inside.

Let go. Relax and Enjoy More.

Have a wonderful week, Being Perfectly You.
www.completelyhuman.com